One of the joys of contributing a weekly column to one of the most popular and widely read agricultural publications in the country is that people get in touch with me from time to time, and I often receive lovely emails, messages and letters in response to something I’ve written.
To be honest, when I’m jotting down whatever’s on my mind that week, I don’t really think about who’s going to read my nonsense, so when I find out that someone has read it, let alone enjoyed it, I’m always pleasantly surprised and feel so honored to have had the opportunity.
But sadly, I have not received the chocolate hobnobs that my predecessor on this page regularly received from his legions of fans.
Obviously, I need to get better, but I’ll be honest with you, I’m more of a Jamie Dodgers fan.
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That aside, I had two reader encounters this past week that made me smile.
The first time was when a very kind woman messaged me asking who made the jacket I was wearing in the photo because her boyfriend wanted a similar jacket.
You have no idea how happy this made me: I strutted into my living room in my Crocs and socks and told a crowd of girls that they could now look upon their dad as a style icon, just as they had always imagined they would someday be.
But I chose to ignore their collective reaction because I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life.
What do those young snobs know anyway? So if there are any designer fashion brands out there who want to take advantage of this development and offer me something for free, or who need me as a farmhouse-style model for a photoshoot, please get in touch.
The second is face to face, where I also get recognised sometimes.
However, I am naturally shy and have a bit of social anxiety and awkwardness in general, especially when I am caught off guard, so I always imagine that I won’t be able to handle it well and that the other person will go home disappointed.
This has happened before at events such as shows, conferences and even in pubs, but this is the first time it’s happened in a motorway service station toilet.
Space Invaders
Some female readers may not be aware of this, but there are unspoken codes of behavior when it comes to men.
There is usually more than one urinal, and men should always choose the one with the two free on either side, unless it is particularly crowded and the only way to be seen is to stand next to another man, keeping your eyes fixed straight ahead.
This is the way British men are and there’s nothing we can do about it.
But this time, as I was standing there doing what I always do at a urinal, out of the corner of my eye I saw a tall man walking towards me.
Imagine my horror when he ignored all the urinals in the distance and chose the one right next to me.
I was then instantly convinced that he was a serial killer and prepared to make my escape. “You’re Will. Farmers Weekly“Right?” he cried in his thick Devon accent.
“I love your column. It always makes me laugh.”
You know what I did? I thanked him profusely and reached out to shake his hand as I went about my business.
Brian, if you’re reading this, sorry, I told you I was awkward.