“Once upon a time…” That’s how older people start conversations. I mean, in my day, people became grandparents and even great-grandparents when they reached my age. The idea of staying healthy at this age was not considered. The main focus was pure gratitude for being alive and having a large family.
Now I’m 49 years old and I see things differently, especially when it comes to food. Now that I’m older, I remember when McDonald’s restaurants were considered actual restaurants and considered a treat. Now they are considered traps.
Previously, the importance of fitness was not fully recognized and after schooling it was mainly reserved for athletes. Half a century later, I find myself not only alive, but actively pursuing fitness while traveling the world.
I played tennis when I was young. I wanted to play Wimbledon, but I quickly learned that in this country it is a very expensive, middle-class sport, and one that is inaccessible to the working class. I always stay healthy, but I have a daily routine. My fitness journey started when I went touring, but getting 10,000 steps a day became almost impossible.
A touring entertainer’s life is basically the same as that of a long-distance truck driver. There are late-night service stations without health-conscious options, the constant temptation of take-out meals, and the temptation to pack a family-sized bag of chips without your family.
The key, I discovered while on the road, lies in pre-tour training. Even just a 10-minute workout he does at home or in a hotel, including star jumps, push-ups, and stretching, is better than no movement.
With a touring schedule of up to 12 hours in the car, sometimes my only exercise is walking to and from the gas station. There are two hours you spend on stage, but you’re usually confined to one location. In fact, I’m so laid back on stage that my smartwatch, which tracks my movements (which doesn’t), sometimes tells me to stand when I’m already standing.
The main secret to staying healthy is not just a diet, but a proper diet. They say abs are made in the kitchen, and this is basically true. No matter how hard you train, eating the wrong foods can backfire. I learned to eliminate foods that are simply stored in the body, which are high in starches that convert into sugar and then fat in the body. The more sugar I consumed, the more tired I felt due to the sugar crash. When I was a kid, I didn’t even know sugar crush existed.
But I’m no saint. My show days are sometimes cheat days and my reward is sometimes a pack of crisps or fish and chips. In my opinion these are Britain’s best creations and we are the kings of beige food.
I try to include protein along with good carbohydrates at every meal. Turkish and Middle Eastern restaurants were found to offer the healthiest menus, with dishes such as hummus, salads, and grilled fish and vegetables becoming key elements. My favorites are these types of dishes served with plain rice, avoiding white bread.
Now that I’m older and wiser, I’ve seen a food revolution happen before my eyes. Either that or I’ve turned into a loud, grumpy old man. Some people may lean towards the latter.
Throughout the years that I have been on stage, society has moved towards different “isms,” but ageism still remains. In contrast to the 80s, when older people held more influence and power around the world, the world seems geared towards young people. Joe Biden is currently the only senior figure in power. It appears Biff Tannen will replace him. back to the future, aka Donald Trump. If these two are examples of old people, we might feel like we’re living in a futuristic dystopia.
So I’m still inspired by seeing people defy age-related expectations. Maybe that gives me hope. According to Google, Morgan Freeman landed his first major film role in his 50s. Morgan Freeman said that even when she was 5 years old, she probably always looked about 50 years old.
The cliché is true – you are never too old. Whether growing older is a privilege or a waste of time is a subjective decision. To me, it enhances the depth of comedy like fine wine. Or, if you don’t think I’m funny, it’s probably like a packet of stale potato chips.
I’m not over it yet. I still dress beyond my 25+ age group.
This week I…
I’m trying… Don’t let it jump. Let me explain. I went to a comedy club and headlined it unannounced as a surprise guest.
By the time I got on stage, the audience was pretty drunk and there was a group of guys in their 50s in the front row. I grilled one of my group of 8 people.
Unfortunately, he got angry and left. After that, seven men remained. Then, in friendship with his friend, another walked away. 2 left, 6 left. But six of them decided they wanted to stay there and stare at me for the entire set.
One of the men in the group decided to insult me in front of the entire audience. Then I had to convince the audience, who were lucky enough to be on my side, and the rest of the group.
There were quite a few of them, so I was hoping they wouldn’t jump on me. Thankfully, I was able to convince them and in the end they shook hands.
teach… Cooking yourself. Or at least trying to do so. Turns out it was mostly experimentation and some google searches.
Basically, I bought a bunch of spices at the grocery store, mixed them together, mixed them with the protein, and then put them in the air fryer.
Cooking is basically experimenting with herbs and spices, but sometimes things go wrong and you end up with a Frankenstein-like meal. You must eat at that point because you are hungry. Consider it a healthy meal since it’s almost 11pm.
Get… Recognized. sometimes. In this day and age, people like me who once packed Wembley Arena can now walk down the street almost unnoticed. In contrast to my youth, this anonymity is broken only by a few fans who recognize me.
This is an unusual experience considering the times when driving with tinted windows was considered necessary. Now, when I’m spotted, my camera phone is often pulled out and my confused expression captured, whether I agree or not.
The golden age is long gone. When someone in a group recognizes me, others usually ask, “Are you famous?” If I were famous, you’d know who I was, innit. I’m basically the most famous person you’ve never heard of.
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