One thing to know about people who talk about you, especially in a disparaging manner, is that if they are busy with their life goals and missions, they probably don’t have time for you. So the next time you hear people talking about you, know that they are basically goalless, aimless, visionless people. They should be pitied, not angry.
“Public opinion is a weak tyrant compared to our own personal opinions. What a person thinks of himself is what determines, or rather indicates, his fate.” ― Henry David Thoreau
- When you feel pain from others, try to refrain from drastic actions or reactions. Rather, choose to meditate, pray, read the scriptures, go exercise, go for a workout, or go do something nice for others. Shift your mind, attention, and focus from the hurt you’ve just been inflicted on something more meaningful. That way, you won’t have to hold on to painful experiences. Rather than worrying too much about what other people think and feel about you, it’s better to care about how you feel and think about yourself. Spend time building your self-image. When you know who you are and God’s plan for your life, what others say about you no longer matters to you.
- One thing to know about people who talk about you, especially in a disparaging manner, is that if they are busy with their life goals and missions, they probably don’t have time for you. So the next time you hear people talking about you, know that they are basically goalless, aimless, visionless people. They should be pitied, not angry.
“We live in a society obsessed with public opinion. But leadership is never about popularity.” ― Marco Rubio
- The next time you hear people talking about you, realize that you can only speak in front of them. That’s why the Bible calls it backbiting. To gossip behind someone’s back, you need to be watching the other person’s back. So you’re just following that person. Only the people behind you speak ill of you. The people in front of you don’t even realize you’re there. They are focused on where they are going. People who talk about you are usually at your level or below you. People who are ahead of you don’t have time for you. Stop saying bad things about you. In other words, when people say bad things about you, they are complimenting you. Because you are ahead, they are following behind you.
“Backbiting is an attempt by someone who is incapable of improving themselves.” ― Hazrat Ali ibn Abu Talib AS
- Sometimes people will talk about you, even if they’re saying bad things about you, and that could be a sign that they’re attracted to you. Sometimes people don’t know how to best express their love. So they can only do what they know, and they can only talk and criticize, but deep down they admire you.
“I’m not asking you to tell me who said something bad about me, but I want to know who said something nice about me.” ― Santiago Roncagliolo
- When others are talking about you and coming under fire, be more realistic. List all your strengths, then list all your weaknesses. Compare both lists and make sure you know yourself better than your enemy knows you. Once you understand yourself, you don’t have to wait for others to teach you who you are. No one needs to open your eyes to who you are because you already know yourself better than they do. Meditate on your strengths every day and at the same time try to reduce your list of weaknesses each week. Let him work on a particular weakness for a week before working on another. That way, while others are busy talking about you, you are busy perfecting yourself.
“If there is anything that unites man and God, it is the courage to uphold a principle when everyone else rejects it.” – Abraham Lincoln
Friends, I hope that my efforts today have been a blessing in knowing how to resist the influence and fear of public opinion. I hope that reading this article will help you become a better version of yourself. I pray that you will be as free as you are to those around you. We encourage you to share this information with anyone you know who may be suffering from the effects of public opinion. Let’s make our world a better place by giving the gift of freedom to others.
Sunday Adelaja is a Nigerian-born leader, change strategist, pastor, and innovator. He was based in Ukraine.
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